Saturday, August 27, 2022

A Poem a Day, Week 34, Aug 20-26

A Poem a Day, Week 34, August 20-26, 2022

Welcome to Sifting the Rubble's weekly blog and podcast of my poem-a-day challenge for 2022. I am your host, and poet, Emily Gibson. The poems for the 34th week of the year, August 20 to 26, were inspired by the natural world of central Oregon, my healing work, and a whirlwind adventure of a trip to Santa Barbara to see my partner Jay's daughter at UCSB. 

I will mention that these are 1 or 2 day poems, which have not gone through the grist of revision. That comes later, something I truly look forward to doing. For now, they are freshly hatched, still a little wet around the ears, maybe a bit wobbly in the knees. Yet each has something to say, so I share them, uncensored, as part of my challenge.

As always, you can keep track of Sifting the Rubble's posts on the Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram platforms:

Facebook (daily posts) : https://www.facebook.com/BlueheronELG
Twitter https://twitter.com/SiftingThe
Instagram https://www.instagram.com/sifting_the_rubble/

Please like and follow and share in whichever ways suit you. Thank you! :)

And now, for this week's poems!


Poem #232, Webs of Life

by Emily Gibson, Aug 20, 2022


We lived in a cobweb,

a crowded place filled with 

carcasses from the past 

and detritus of the present.

At times it transformed into

an orb web strung with dew, 

shot through with lines of delight.

Those times shocked our lives

with brilliance.  Remembered, they

sparkle, settle my heart,

and fill my head with wonder.

These sandy memories

are all I allowed myself.

Survival in that web of dark

took strength and skills.

We crafted tools of protection:

honed sharp, lined with barbs,

they stuck to our own skin, 

long past expiration dates.

From this tangled chaos,

on the cusp of maturity,

we emerged, blinked in the sun

and found our individual ways.

Each of us mined that cobweb

for silver and gold--

enough to weight a suitcase

heavy with treasure.

Unnoticed, shards shimmied

into nooks and crannies of luggage,

hidden, ready to puncture our balloons

as we rose above and traveled

on our silks in search of homes.

We separately refused to look at what was,

it felt like betrayal--

we knew what our spider mother

wove from her past,

the sacrifice, her effort to shield us

from her family strands

stretched back multiple generations.

Gratitude could not share space,

left no place for our hurt or confusion.

Time passed, taught that we 

had to see it,

had to go back

and save ourselves

from the corners where we crouched,

ears covered to block out 

noise and fear.

So now we walk

similar paths of discovery,

weaving new webs.

We unpack our suitcases completely,

shake out the shards,

say goodbye to the voices inside

that kept us hidden.

Accept the good,

name the bad,

feel free to love what was

and now is.

Growth is not inevitable, 

but it sure looks good on you.


About "Webs of Life": After a recent visit with my brother, I wrote this poem about two siblings and their separate paths to dealing with childhood trauma. Though it is a very personal poem, when I shared it, I found that people related it to whatever struggles they were working on, whatever growth they were experiencing. They felt I was talking to them. Something about the "you" in use here, perhaps. Either way, I am very fond of this poem because it captures the goal of recovery work: to name what happened without blame.

Poem #233, Dry Ice Dust 

by Emily Gibson, Aug 21, 2022


Yesterday, my horse’s hooves brushed the sand

at a just-right height, when the temperature 


was just so, and the wind hovered like a 

hummingbird, to create a dry ice dust.


It floated for a moment, hugged the curves 

of the ground like fog, before grainy parts 


fell, too heavy, and the rest settled, light.

Then his next step sent dust aloft again. 


About "Dry Ice Dust": This poem captures a moment in the sun with my horse. It is a simple image, conveyed by couplets in 10-syllable lines

Poem #234, What Egg?

by Emily Gibson, Aug 22, 2022


What wise avian parent disposed this shell

in a location far removed from hatchling's peeps,

to distract predators predisposed to

oviparous delicacies?

Though not the shocking blue

of robin eggs or the tiny fragment

of half a hummingbird egg

I sought on childhood walks,

this shell, today, delights

my senses just as much.





Eggshell found on ground.



















About "What Egg?": This poem is simply a narration of my thoughts upon finding this shell. I wasn't sure if it was left by a predator after eating the insides, or if it was dropped by a parent to distract predators. During composition, I chose the latter.



Poem #235, Ponderosa Benthamiana 

by Emily Gibson, Aug 23, 2022


On this day, your needles stood out

though my eyes know you well,

of that there is no doubt.

The shape of your tufts delight,

how your needles sprout

evenly from each central whorl,

like a mechanically spaced cloud.

From below, in your shadow,

your branches darkly crowd,

to capture sun’s light for growth.

At tuft’s end, rays find a route,

light up each needle’s tip,

then reach my forest hangout, 

in green-tinted sunbeams.




Ponderosa branches, seen from below, at Lake Siskiyou.


















About "Ponderosa Benthamiana": As this poem describes, I have looked at, and overlooked, Ponderosas many times. This time was different. The beauty of the needles against the blue! I sought to put those differences into words. The first lines of the couplets rhyme, or near rhyme, but I did not use a syllable count for lines.


Poem #236, Satellite  

by Emily Gibson, Aug 24, 2022


I landed in your orbit,

a satellite of little influence.

I sought to do no harm,

to be a positive element

in your periodic table,

reflecting back to you

your beauty and confidence.

It is a privilege to watch

your navigation of life.

From my vantage point,

out here, a star afar, 

you are totally rocking it.


About "Satellite": We took a trip to Santa Barbara this week to see Jay's daughter at college, our last real window of opportunity before her graduation in June, given all of our schedules. I was inspired to write this poem during this trip. This is another poem that had specific people in mind, but when I shared it, people saw themselves in the words and ideas. Again, I think it is the "you" that allows that to happen. A happy accident!

Poem #237, Tumbleweeds of the Seas 

by Emily Gibson, Aug 25, 2022


Along the shore they lie motionless,

the sea’s winds powerless 

to budge them any bit.

Once scattered by waves, 

now immobilized by tide’s turn, 

like tumbleweeds on a desert 

floor after the wind quiets.

Weighted with sand, shells, 

rocks, strands of seaweed,

plankton’s abandoned egg sacs, 

and an abundance of exoskeletons,

they await the moon’s tug,

to move freely, again.






Beach below UCSB, Goleta, CA.




















About "Tumbleweeds of the Seas": As soon as I saw these root balls of kelp, I thought about the tumbleweeds in central Oregon and wanted to write this poem, playing on the similarities of water and wind.



Poem #238, Emotional Sobriety 

by Emily Gibson, Aug 26, 2022


Thought I was so much better

since I eschewed intoxicants.

From an early age I abstained

substances eaten, smoked, and 

ingested from outside.

When offered, whether legal or not,

No, I said, with firm resolution.

I don’t want to lose reality, 

I don’t like to lose control.  

I don’t need to hide from life.  

Smug satisfaction.

The joke was on me, I guess. 

Pain is pain.   

My reality? Illusion.

My control? Ephemeral.

Yes, I hid from my life light,

lost to my inner drug store’s

intoxicants of fear, over-commitment, 

showing up late, procrastination, 

shame, self-criticism...  

Under the influence, 

on the inside,

ensured my isolation.

It is time to sober up.  


About "Emotional Sobriety": In my reading this week, I came across a passage about emotional sobriety. I felt like a bright light shone on me and I could not hide from the truth. Which meant I needed to write a poem to process and capture that truth!

And that concludes Sifting the Rubble's poetry for this week! I hope you enjoyed this collection of poems. Perhaps some of them spoke to you, or maybe you found one begging to be shared with someone else. If so, I hope you will pass it on! Either way, thank you for listening and reading. Hope to see you next week!

Saturday, August 20, 2022

A Poem a Day, Week 33, Aug 13-19

A Poem a Day, Week 33, August 13 to 19, 2022

Welcome to Sifting the Rubble's weekly blog and podcast of my poem-a-day challenge for 2022. I am your host, and poet, Emily Gibson. The poems for the 33rd week of the year, August 13 to 19, find their origins in family photos and events of the week, some momentous, some tiny slivers of time, most involving aspects of nature.  (Some of the poems this week have accompanying images, which you can view on the blog if you choose)

I will mention that these are 1 or 2 day poems, which have not gone through the grist of revision. That comes later, something I truly look forward to doing. For now, they are newly born, still a bit unsteady on their feet. Yet each has something to say, so I share them, uncensored, as part of my challenge.

As always, you can keep track of Sifting the Rubble's posts on the Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram platforms:

Facebook (daily posts) : https://www.facebook.com/BlueheronELG
Twitter https://twitter.com/SiftingThe
Instagram https://www.instagram.com/sifting_the_rubble/

Please like and follow and share in whichever ways suit you. Thank you! :)

And now, for this week's poems!



Poem #225, Idle Hour, 1968 

by Emily Gibson, Aug 13, 2022


Idle Hour in Tyee City,

like in England, this house had a name.

A place of transition.  A station 

in-between. The start of a new start.

Before my memory, just fifteen 

months old, not sure what I thought. World 

upside down, new home, different yard,

no fuchsias to follow, Dad gone from

my sight. When I became aware, when 

I woke up to consciousness as a 

child aged four or five, it was all I 

knew. I loved my life and everyone 

in it. My adult self feels sorrow 

for how it went down, though I was and 

am powerless, that I do admit.




Stuart, David, Holly (Mom), and Emily (me) in Tyee City, late 1968







About "Idle Hour, 1968": This photo fostered some deep digging on my family history. It made me realize that when we become "conscious" as children, we come into knowing who we are, who our family is. But there are years of events that happened before that moment of "arrival" into our brains and knowing. I attempted to wrestle with the moment my mom left my dad when I was 15 months old in this poem of 9-syllable lines.



Poem #226, Not Exceptional  

by Emily Gibson, Aug 14, 2022


People say that teenagers think

they are invincible, think bad

things won’t happen to them,

that they are exceptional, smart, 

beyond all who have come before

who may have made mistakes.  

Maybe some youth think this,

maybe most in fact.  But I can’t 

be the only teen who thought bad

things can and will happen 

to me, without merit or fault.  I 

am not immune to tragedy,

despite the lessons learned

from all who preceded me. 

So when that curve ahead sign

reads 35 mph, I slow to that

speed, regardless of vehicle.

Odd how my thought that I

am not a unique individual

might in fact be exceptional!


About "Not Exceptional": A local tragedy of a teenager drinking and driving to their death inspired this poem. The girl was "smart" and "goal-driven" and no one expected her to make the mistakes that led to her death. Many articles I read referred to teenage exceptionality, and the idea that you can tell them the dangers, but they won't listen. Being a teenager who did listen, I had to write this poem!

Poem #227, Listen to Their Stories 

by Emily Gibson, Aug 15, 2022


The burden we place on combat veterans

to carry the horrors of war,

is like invisible jugs of water;

it can weigh them down

for life.

We civilians

never have to see it,

outside of newsreels,

watery chapters in the history texts

and glorified movies of heroic deeds.

Though no longer enlisted

they soldier on 

forever.

To never belong here

or there,

because the water sloshes

and reminds us

they are touched

from savagery and cruelty.

Yet they carry their heavy toxic jugs

and rarely let on,

all so I can cycle down a tree lined road

without flashbacks

or shell shock

or PTSD.

As hard as it might be

to hear their stories

imagine living them.


About "Listen to Their Stories":  I have been learning recently about my grandfather, who served in WWI, and what he experienced, how it impacted him his whole life but I never knew. In my reading about trauma and PTSD I noticed most trauma research had been done with combat soldiers. That was hard reading, brutal details. That got me thinking about the silent burden combat veterans carry, and about what we can do. The final nail in this poem was the delight of hosting a friend's 90+ year old father, a WWII combat veteran, for three days.  Sitting with him and listening to his harrowing stories, it struck me that we must do more to support and care for our veterans. It is too easy to get caught up in our lives and forget, when you don't have a veteran in your life every day.  


Poem #228, Paratrooper Explosion

by Emily Gibson, Aug 16, 2022


Paratrooper explosion from above,

Envy of a stealth military operation.

Joyful expression of life’s promise,

Tiniest molecules strung together

Into eight pipets of legs

Waving wildly,

Tasting the world 

To see what is possible.

Where the breeze lands them,

They set up confident silk lines

To make home where they are:

Lamp, computer,

A water bottle left still too long,

The hairs on my arm, 

Or the pencil in my right hand.

Thank goodness, 

Like infants of any species,

Just-hatched spiderlings

Foster patience

And hope.


About "Paratrooper Explosion": When a baby spider landed on my book one day, I thought "I need to find this egg sac and move it outside before it explodes." I promptly forgot until I was looking up at the skylight while stretching and saw five little spiders descending from the skylight's well. I found a container, captured all I could find and the now empty egg sac. They enchanted me with their waving legs. Later that day, I saw three at my computer desk. My delay means I will likely need to remove baby spiders throughout the house for weeks to come!



Poem #229, Two Handsome Devils

by Emily Gibson, Aug 17, 2022


Stately spans

of richly fuzzed horns

float by the front window,

startle my computer-focused eyes.

Nonplussed by camera clicks,

they walk, assured,

confident.

I made up

matter-of-fact

herbivore voices:

Don’t mind us,

just passing through

in search of a rumored

stag party 

for bucks like us.




Two bucks walking to the park, Bend, OR.










About "Two Handsome Devils": One early morning I startled to see a set of velvet horns float across my front window. By the time I got outside, these two had rounded the corner, on their way to the park and I only captured this photo of them.


Poem #230, Actors 

by Emily Gibson, Aug 18, 2022


Be an Actor.

Not the kind who

pretends to be 

someone else;

who takes on

another’s character

to entertain or educate,

who hides, no mask needed.

Be an Actor.

The kind who moves 

forward, even if 

just incremental steps,

who makes decisions close 

to the true self.

That self who smiled out

without censor

when you were a toddler

or Kindergartener.

Find that photo,

pin it on your wall,

remember YOUR self.

You are a north star.






Emily (me), Kindergarten, 1972.













About "Actors": In the healing work I am doing right now, I am considering how I became a reactor as I grew up, which factors into my development of disease. This photo captures me before I learned to react to others instead of taking action from my inner self. The word "actor" has multiple meanings, and I tend to use it to mean pretending to be someone else. Here, I use it as "someone who takes action" as a way to own the word. And am I the only one who thinks the clothing of the early 70s was exceptionally exuberant?

Poem #231, Red Sun, Fire-Smoked Sky

by Emily Gibson, Aug 19, 2022


the arc of nature 

tilts ever to beauty

such that no matter

all we humans do

or cause to be done

to this world

and its creatures,

nature will transform

the planet to beauty 

again

once we’re

done and gone.





Sunset in smoke, Bend, OR









About "Red Sun, Fire Smoked Sky": All week, the first line of this poem had been playing in my brain, reflecting back to Martin Luther King, Jr's often quoted words, "The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice." Nature is resilient, and even with fires raging all around us, we remain surrounded with beauty, if we look for it.


And that concludes Sifting the Rubble's poetry for this week! I hope you enjoyed this collection of poems. Perhaps some of them spoke to you, or maybe you found one begging to be shared with someone else. If so, I hope you will pass it on! Either way, thank you for listening and reading. Hope to see you next week!

Poem a Day Week 52, Dec 24-30

   Poem a Day, Week 52, Dec 24 to 30, 2022 Welcome to Sifting the Rubble's weekly blog and podcast of my poem-a-day challenge for 2022. ...